Sterben und Tod
Die 13. Klasse, Englisch-Leistungskurs, des Walther-Ratenau-Gymnasiums war bei Drews Bestattungen zu Besuch. Die Lehrerin hatte mich gebeten, im Rahmen Ihrer Unterrichtseinheit zu den Themen Sterben und Tod, den SchülerInnen über meine Arbeit und meine Erfahrungen zu berichten und Fragen zu beantworten. Später wurde von allen ein Text verfasst (natürlich in Englisch!), in welchem die SchülerInnen Ihre Vorstellung von der eigenen Bestattung zu Papier bringen sollten. Hier einige Beispiele, für die ich mich an dieser Stelle recht herzlich bei den VerfasserInnen bedanken möchte, auch für die Bereitschaft, sich diesen Themen so offen und doch kritisch zu stellen. Mein Dank gilt auch der Lehrerin, die für Ihren Kurs so viel Interesse aufbringt, dass sie auf die Idee kam, den Unterricht in meinen Räumen statt finden zu lassen, auch, um eventuell vorhandene Berührungsängste mit der Thematik zu nehmen.
Hier einige Texte der Schülerinnen und Schüler:
If I have children: If I have children my funeral should be in a quite personel circle only the mother of my children, my children and theire children. One thing that really should be is, that i want to be burned, because I am really afraid to wake up and being not able to come out of that cuffin. The speech at my funeral should be giving by my relatives, because they know me best. I dont want them to grief too much a bit loughter is not wrong as well. I mean I am at a better place then (may be). If my children live all together in one city I want to be buried at a graveyard otherwise Í´d prefer to be buried in a (Friedwald).
If i do not have children; If I do not have children I want my funeral to be with just my closesr friends ( one or two(if they still live)) and a priest. My grave shall then by in every case in a (Friedwald).
A beautiful funeral A funeral is an opportunity to say good-bye for relatives and friends of the deceased. A last honour should be given to the dead man or woman. The whole family and all friends should come to a funeral. All of them are supposed to wear black clothes. In the little chapel of the cemetary a priest or a good friend should hold a nice speech about the deceased in order to keep him or her positively in mind. I know that a funeral is something sad but nevertheless the speech should not be too sad and boring. The speech has to be a mixture of happiness and sadness. Most importantly the chapel and the coffin should be decorated with a lot of white, orange and red roses so that the room looks beautiful. After the speech the coffin has to be carried to the grave. Consequently all people have to follow it. Now the priest speaks a prayer and every single person puts flowers and sand into the grave. Afterwards family and friends eat together and talk with each other. My personal wish is that my ashes would be scattered into the ocean.
My Funeral: For my funeral I want a coffin made of light wood. I want to wear a black suit and a red tie. The cemetery where I will lie shall be a forest with a lot of space and not too many graves. At the funeral people can look at me a last time if they want to. There is no dresscode for the people attending my funeral, they should only feel as comfortable as they can. I do not want my funeral to be religious and to be made by a priest because now I am not religious at all and if there is a heaven, God would not send me there just on account of my religious funeral he would have wanted me to be religious a long time, I think, and that is what I am not. The music is a great rock song I like, for example „Wish You Were Here“ by Pink Floyd, but I am not sure about that. After the funeral there shall be a nice dinner for everbody who liked me and who I liked.
My Death: A death is never positive. There will always be a person who suffers from a person´s death. I don’t want people to cry about me. I want people to be happy. But on the other hand… what, happy about my death? I am in a moment of my life where I think of my death as a thing that is soooo far away. It makes me easy to think about it because I hope that the death wont come to me in the next 70 years. I don’t want to lie in a coffin since I am Jewish and my tradition tells me to be wrapped in a white “saffan” that is a big white towel. I definitely want to be buried in Israel. It’s a very holy and spiritual place for me and my family members are also buried in Israel. I am a family person. I love being around my family and making different things with them. Although my family is not very big I still enjoy every minute with them. That´s why I definitely want my family to be around me during my funeral. I hope I will have a big family in my future life on earth. I want them to be sad but I don’t want their emotions to take control over their daily life. It is healthy to suffer and to be sad but you should take your time and not start your daily bases as usual. What worries me more than my funeral is the actual dying process. I don’t want to die in pain neither physical nor mental. And I also don’t want to die suddenly.Sitting and waiting for the death to come sounds also very brutal to me. I want to die in peace maybe while sleeping or dreaming. When you sleep the switching from life to death is so quick that you don’t even realize it. I hate hospitals and being there in the last moments of my life sounds also very harsh to me. It actually doesn’t matter what you wish for your funeral or your death. Everything is meant to be if we want it or not. We cannot change the fact that we are all going to die die one day. We should enjoy every minute in life at this moment. With the people that we love and care about. I see death as something positive. A beginning of something new.
Own funeral: First of all for me it is difficult to write about my own funeral. The idea is strange and I have not thought about it before. In general I have my problems to deal with death but at the same time I know that we are born to die and dying is a part of life that cannot be changed. So one day also my funeral will take place. Even though it would be difficult for my friends and relatives, I would appreciate them not to be in a very sad mood. I wish that they remember the nice times and happy days we had together. In general I want to be buried in a coffin maybe near my relatives. I would also be pleased if someone gave a speech that includes funny situations of my life or things that were in a way typical of me. Furthermore my grave should be decorated with colourful flowers and it could be played a carefree song that can be associated with me for example the “Four Seasons“ by Vivaldi. Moreover the people do not have to wear black. After the funeral my bereaved should go together into a restaurant we had often been to. I want my relatives and friends not to supress their grief but I would be happy if instead of sadness or mourning for me they just were cheerful that I had lived. All in all hoping that we will meet again, I want my family and friends to take leave of me with pleasant thoughts but (of course) they should not forget me.